Sunday, March 21, 2010

Thoughts on Deployment

It's been a while since I've blogged.  I was busy the first half of the week.  Then, after reading about Rachel's loss, I really didn't know what to say.  My heart just breaks for her and her daughter every time I think about it.  At the same time, I'm amazed at how all the military spouses have came together through a tough time. 

If you keep up with my blog, you know that Anthony will have his first deployment in May.  I try to keep it in the back of my mind and enjoy the time that I have with him now.  I'm kind of scared of what I will be like when the time gets closer.  I remember how I felt before he left for basic (which was only 6 1/2 weeks).  I cried for days leading up to it and I cried pretty much the whole time he was gone.  I cry as I think about it. 

So, I ask, how do you cope with it and what do you recommend doing to make it easier?


Jessica Lynn said...

Will you pass on your recommendations to me? Kenny's being deployed in May, too (end of April, really).

That last time he was deployed I was just his girlfriend, still living with my parents, and in a different state. I have a feeling this is going to hit me a whole lot harder.

We can wallow and throw pity parties together.

Katie F said...

Keep as busy as possible and go on with your day to day activities at home. that's what worked for me.
I also started reading alot! Books can get me through anything

Mrs. G.I. Joe said...

Honey I wish I could give you a magic formula. All I can tell you is that when my GIJoe deployed to Iraq for the whole first year of our marriage I handled it so badly. I was practically crippled with fear and depression. My biggest advice is ask for help and do it often. Don't try to be Wonder Woman. Its okay to cry and to let others know you miss your husband. Talk to anyone, whether they are civilian friends/family or military. Keeping things bottled up will only hurt yourself. But that's how I handled it. I was sick and miserable most of that year.

Maybe when he leaves make a big list of projects and goals. I don't know how long he'll be gone but maybe have a list of things to accomplish each month. Mark things off as you go so you can see you are making progress and getting through. Keep a calendar not of how many days he's gone but how many days you made it through and how many days till he's expected home.

Oh and another BIG thing...this is just my opinion...try to start thinking of and planning his homecoming when you are about 1/2 way through the deployment. Starting earlier or right away will make the time drag.

And email me if you ever need to talk!

The Displaced Baker said...

My Hubby is supposed to deploy for the first time at the end of the year. I am going to be a complete wreck while he is gone :( Basic and tech school were hard on me so I can just imagine how his deployment will be.

Young Mom/Wife said...

I am definitely thinking about you! James Bonds deployment got moved, but in all of my research I have two books (as if you have time to read right now) to recommend to you:1)Separated by Duty, United in Love. 2)Faith Deployed.

Faith Deployed also has a blog and they are a WONDERFUL resource. Finally, surround yourself with positive people not people who are constantly going to say "I just don't know how you do it." that will help a lot.

Good luck, and you two are in my prayers.

Jessica said...

I haven't been through a deployment yet, so I have no real advice to offer. What's been said above sounds like great words of advice. I just wanted to say that I'm thinking about you!!